Reach for the Big Chair

The other day I texted a dear friend with a new discovery about neurodiversity and how to work with individuals on the spectrum.  The article I had discovered discussed stemming (a strategy used to deal with overwhelm); what stemming is, who manifests stemming and why stemming is useful.

I read through the info, texted my friend and she wrote back to me instantly – as all dear friends often do – and said how ‘“seeing that must feel freeing”.  

And I replied, “Yes, in a wisdom and compassion kind-a-way….”

This got me thinking about the dynamic between compassion, wisdom and freedom.  As I sat with this notion the image of a chair wafted up into view.

This chair (pick one) is compassion herself.  Notice that when you take your seat in this chair you are enfolded in a hug –  these arms hold you – not too tight, not too loose.  

You are taking time for a hug.

And it is you are giving yourself this hug.  It may take the form of a cup of tea while sitting in this chair. Whatever form this hug takes (just sitting, drinking tea, visioning/daydreaming, journaling, knitting, drawing) you are demonstrating compassion for yourself. 

And if you can do this for yourself you can do this for others. 

This chair is the throne from which I survey my queendom.  For me compassion is a greater sense of space and to sit in this chair is to feel unrestricted.  

I rest in my heart when I take a seat in this chair.

Avenues open.  

I no longer feel locked into a personalization that makes me feel isolated and lonely.

This mindset of isolation leads to thinking “Either I ‘stick it’ to you or you ‘stick it’ to me.” 

Someone actually said this to me.

Do you feel how narrow this space is?  How rigid and confining? 

When we feel compassion our hearts becomes softer, more palpable.  In addition to this we feel a sense of curiosity about the other.  Why are they acting this way?  What has happened?  Certainly there is a reason for their hurtful behavior.  Let’s see if I (or we) can work this out.

This is the beginning of wisdom.  We start to learn, and because we are learning we are growing.  We are moving. Changing.  And this is actually quite exciting.

So as we move and grow and change we keep our eyes open onto the why of things.  This ‘why’ can be a rather intellectual endeavor. Which can be stimulating but somewhat dry.

So we bring our emotions into the equation: our hearts. When we understand the why of things our hearts open that much wider.  A big heart can travel in an infinite number of directions because we feel and see so much more than the limited ‘I’ of a narrow ego perspective.

Being compassionate in the pursuit of wisdom is not just interesting – it’s fun.  And with the right chair – relaxing.  

You can do this forever. 

So reach for the big chair – the chair of compassion – this seat of gateways whose doors are always open. 

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